I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
