Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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