My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
