the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I wish you could order shots online.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
being pregnant is like rehab
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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