There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
