It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
