Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize
