We won't sleep together?
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
