Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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