So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
