ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
She just used a chaser for red wine.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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