His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize