My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
