i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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