their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
