Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize