The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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