You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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