Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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