summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
