I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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