We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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