I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
