So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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