i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
i've created a new STD.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Randomize
