Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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