i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Randomize
