at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
