Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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