During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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