all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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