Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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