I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
