it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
