yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize