he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
