Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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