I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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