So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize
