Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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