I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
