im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
