so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize