What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Randomize
