I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Mom said you looked used
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
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