I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
