i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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