She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
