so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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