im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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