Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
