I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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